My journey...

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Men....

I just watched the much talked after (by my youth) movie called twilight. Never really knew why the girls are so crazy about it. At least the youth girls. But now I know. It is about a vampire teenage boy who fell in love with a girl. He is cute (Not in the movie though), charming, romantic, strong and masculine. Masculine not in terms of muscles but he is a guy guy. One who really takes care and protects the girl he loves. Sometimes in the real world, it is often the girl who protects the guys.



I have heard comments from guys saying "the girl scares me. She is too successful. She is too dominant. She is too driven"

I have heard comments from girls saying "Guys are sissies nowadays. He should be a man. He is a man and should be more masculine. "

So tough to be a guy in this day and age. If he is too gentle, they are called sissies. If they are too tough, they are branded too egoistical. But it is true that many of the managerial roles are now filled by women. Women who seems stronger than men. More capable. More driven. Takes more initiatives. Even these girls who seem so dominant, when you talk with then, they would want their partner to "Wear the pants" because this is who we are. Who God created us to be. To be under the leadership of men. To be the help-mate of men. Not that we are less than men but just being different in our make up.

Perhaps the gender roles are changing and girls are trying to be males. Trying to be equal to take the roles of males. Including being the head of the house. Can't blame them. Pressure of society. When males do not step up to their roles. Not in every case though.

Maybe I am a traditional girl. Still believe that guys must do the chasing and that a girl have to give space for him to be him. Not "mother" over him. Someone told me the other day that this is the 20th century and girls can make the first move. Hrmm..

I was reading a book by Elisabeth Elliot and in there was a letter that one of her readers wrote to her.

" I have read Passion and Purity and your books on masculinity and femininity(the Mark of a Man and Let Me be A Woman). My heart absolutely leaps with excitement in agreement with the things you say. That's the way it should be!! Unfortunately, I am finding out that that's not the way it is. Instead of men being strong in the Lord. leaders, hunters, taking the initiative (Their God ordained role), they are becoming weak, insecure, afraid of rejection and not wanting to take risk - even to make a simple phone call or invitation. I want to believe in God's order, but where is it anymore? I get so confused with what I am suppose to do or not do, I am ready to forget this whole dating and getting acquainted business. Where's the persistence, the determination to win a girl's heart and t rust, cost what it will? Where's the peace, surety, confidence, fun, anticipation? Do we have to become aggressive because men aren't?"

A guy once said "I will fight anyone for you" but he too gave up against the slightest competition. Too afraid to pursue in case he would loose. That would have been tragic for him.

Times have certainly changed since the time of Elisabeth Elliot but I have to agree with her though that girls are created differently than guys. That girls should be girls and guys should be guys. Over the years, God did not change His mind about this and create girls to be stronger then guys. Eph 5:23-24. Husband is still the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church.

So in my journey, continues this quest for love. Perhaps that is why I am still single. Waiting for someone who is has gone extinct? So many girls I know who are waiting for the same thing. Maybe I am living in a fairytale of my own.
posted by Janelle at 7:20 PM 2 comments

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

SO Many Questions

There are so many questions in my mind. Maybe too many for my own good. As an impatient person, I keep asking "When..." or "Why is it happening this way..." or "How come I have to... " "Why the wait...." Perhaps these questions are not so important to my Christian walk. That is why God is still silent. Or perhaps He is teaching me patience... but I long to know!!! Maybe if I were to know... maybe life will not be so painful or hard?

I suppose Job has had many questions too. Sudden death of all his children. Lost of his wealth. His health. I would have tons of questions if I were Job. A man who walked in the ways of God. Who see himself blameless in his own eyes... Why all these calamities? But in the end, it is recognising that God is supreme and Lord. Looking at Him rather than at what is right in his own eyes... that was the heart that God seeks after. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, Thou art with me. Your rod and your staff they comfort me.

Why do I have so many questions? To satisfy my own desires? To prove that I am right? To know what is ahead of me? To fill my self righteousness? Maybe my questions are the wrong questions. Maybe it should be more tuned towards God and what He is doing in my life. After all, He is still Lord of my life.

I kept singing this song by Tim Hughes...

I've got questions Without answers
I've known sorrow I have known pain
But there's one thing That I'll cling to
You are faithful, Jesus you're true

When hope is lost I'll call you Saviour
When pain surrounds I'll call you healer
When silence falls, you'll be the song within my heart

In the lone hour of my sorrow
Through the darkest night of my soul
You surround me and sustain me
My defender forevermore.

I will praise you, I will praise you
When the tears fall still I will sing to you
I will praise you, Jesus praise you
Though the suffering still I will sing.
posted by Janelle at 1:52 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Silent Retreat

I have just recently signed up for a silent retreat. My first. I do not know what to expect but I have been trying by myself to have times of silent and it is such a discipline. Maybe that is why it is recommended in the book of "Spiritual discipline". It should be a lifestyle more than a discipline.

Being silent and meditating upon Him and His word creates an environment where we come closer to Him and that is what I long to do. Be a Mary in this Martha world. As someone has put it.

Joyce Hugget once wrote:

"Christian meditation has nothing to do with emptying our minds. Christian meditation engages every part of us -our mind, our emotions, our imagination, our creativity, and, supremely, our will."

Choosing to meditate and to be silent is to actually fill oneself with and to be intimately attached to the object of your meditation. Not like how the new ager would meditate - freeing one's mind for nothingness. In the book of Joshua, it tells us to "meditate on His word day and night so that we may be care careful to do everything written in it. Then we will be prosperous and successful." So that scripture becomes ingrained in us. So that it draws us closer to God.

"We bask in the warmth of his love. We feel his gaze on us. He fills us afresh with his Spirit. We receive a new perspective on life - his perspective. We draw so close to his heart that we sense his concern for the world, and from our contemplation flows intercession as we catch his compassion for a hurting world."
Joyce Huggett

So I shall be going to this silent retreat for 5 days. I am a bit excited. But I should not wait for retreats to mediate on Him and His word or be silent. Cultivating a culture that is not my own.



posted by Janelle at 10:48 PM 3 comments

Monday, April 20, 2009

Beauty

Someone just sent me this to confirm my previous post about beauty on the inside. Why do people prefer the photoshopped version? Everyone is trying to look like film stars and models.








posted by Janelle at 8:39 PM 0 comments

Beauty on the inside

I have read this article about Susan Boyle. The lady who shocked the whole world for her talent. Shocked because she looked ordinary and plain. Yet has such a tremendous voice. When she sang, I actually cried. Our world has put such emphasis upon the outward appearance that most girls chase after. Die after. The famous saying of "inward beauty is better than outward appearance" will always remain just a saying. In reality, girls and even guys are always chasing after the outward appearance. This is because there is such tremendous pressure from the world. The belief that beauty will get you further. Better boyfriends/girlfriends. Better prospect and job. Giving attention to the outward rather than the inward. Even Christians, we tend to judge others by appearance. Here is the article...

The beauty that matters is always on the inside
COLETTE DOUGLAS HOME April 14 2009

Susan Boyle's story is a parable of our age. She is a singer of enormous talent, who cared for her widowed mother until she died two years ago. Susan's is a combination of ability and virtue that deserves congratulation.

So how come she was treated as a laughing stock when she walked on stage for the opening heat of Britain's Got Talent 2009 on Saturday night?

The moment the reality show's audience and judging panel saw the small, shy, middle-aged woman, they started to smirk. When she said she wanted a professional singing career to equal that of Elaine Paige, the camera showed audience members rolling their eyes in disbelief. They scoffed when she told Simon Cowell, one of the judges, how she'd reached her forties without managing to develop a singing career because she hadn't had the opportunity. Another judge, Piers Morgan, later wrote on his blog that, just before she launched into I Dreamed a Dream, the 3000-strong audience in Glasgow was laughing and the three judges were suppressing chuckles.
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It was rude and cruel and arrogant. Susan Boyle from Blackburn, West Lothian, was presumed to be a buffoon. But why?

Britain's Got Talent isn't a beauty pageant. It isn't a youth opportunity scheme. It is surely about discovering untapped and unrecognised raw talent from all sections of society.

And Susan Boyle has talent to burn. Such is the beauty of her voice that she had barely sung the opening bars when the applause started. She rounded off to a standing ovation and - in her naivety - began walking off the stage and had to be recalled.

Susan, now a bankable discovery, was then roundly patronised by such mega-talents as Amanda Holden and the aforementioned Morgan, who told her: "Everyone laughed at you but no-one is laughing now. I'm reeling with shock." Holden added: "It's the biggest wake-up call ever."

Again, why?

The answer is that only the pretty are expected to achieve. Not only do you have to be physically appealing to deserve fame; it seems you now have to be good-looking to merit everyday common respect. If, like Susan (and like millions more), you are plump, middle-aged and too poor or too unworldly to follow fashion or have a good hairdresser, you are a non-person.

I dread to think of how Susan would have left the stage if her voice had been less than exceptional. She would have been humiliated in front of 11 million viewers. It's the equivalent of being put in the stocks in front of the nation instead of the village. It used to be a punishment handed out to criminals. Now it is the fate of anyone without obvious sexual allure who dares seek opportunity.

This small, brave soul took her courage in her hands to pitch at her one hope of having her singing talent recognised, and was greeted with a communal sneer. Courage could so easily have failed her.

Yet why shouldn't she sound wonderful? Not every great singer looks like Katherine Jenkins. Edith Piaf would never have been chosen to strut a catwalk. Nor would Nina Simone, nor Ella Fitzgerald. As for Pavarotti But then ridicule is nothing new in Susan Boyle's life. She is a veteran of abuse. She was starved of oxygen at birth and has learning difficulties as a result. At school she was slow and had frizzy hair. She was bullied, mostly verbally. She told one newspaper that her classmates' jibes left behind the kind of scars that don't heal.

She didn't have boyfriends, is a stranger to romance and has never been kissed. "Shame," she said. Singing was her life-raft.

She lived with her parents in a four-bedroom council house and, when her father died a decade ago, she cared for her mother and sang in the church choir.

It was an unglamorous existence. She wasn't the glamorous type - and being a carer isn't a glamorous life, as the hundreds of thousands who do that most valuable of jobs will testify. Even those who start out with a beauty routine and an interest in clothes find themselves reverting to the practicality of a tracksuit and trainers. Fitness plans get interrupted and then abandoned. Weight creeps on. Carers don't often get invited to sparkling dinner parties or glitzy receptions, so smart clothes rarely make it off the hanger.

Then, when a special occasion comes along, they might reach, as Susan did, for the frock they bought for a nephew's wedding. They might, as she did, compound the felony of choosing a colour at odds with her skin tone and an unflattering shape with home-chopped hair, bushy eyebrows and a face without a hint of make-up. But it is often evidence of a life lived selflessly; of a person so focused on the needs of another that they have lost sight of themselves. Is that a cause for derision or a reason for congratulation? Would her time have been better spent slimming and exercising, plucking and waxing, bleaching and botoxing? Would that have made her voice any sweeter?

Susan Boyle's mother encouraged her to sing. She wanted her to enter Britain's Got Talent. But the shy Susan hasn't been able to sing at all since her mother's death two years ago. She wasn't sure how her voice would emerge after so long a silence. Happily, it survived its rest.

She is a gift to Simon Cowell and reality television. Her story is the stuff of Hans Christian Andersen: the woman plucked from obscurity, the buried talent uncovered, the transformation waiting to be wrought.

It is wonderful for her, too, that her stunning voice is now recognised. A bright future beckons. Her dream is becoming reality.

Susan is a reminder that it's time we all looked a little deeper. She has lived an obscure but important life. She has been a companionable and caring daughter. It's people like her who are the unseen glue in society; the ones who day in and day out put themselves last. They make this country civilised and they deserve acknowledgement and respect.

Susan has been forgiven her looks and been given respect because of her talent. She should always have received it because of the calibre of her character.
posted by Janelle at 8:19 PM 0 comments

Susan Boyle from Britain's Got Talent

Here is an interview with Susan Boyle

posted by Janelle at 8:10 PM 0 comments

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Is Lent Biblical?

I have always wondered about traditions, icons and practices. So many which is not mentioned in the bible. But why do we still hold on to the practices faithfully? Is it a stumbling block of mere practices. Works without faith? But lately I have grown to enjoy such traditions and practices. Meditations and icons. Thanks to my STM lecturer. Not that I have changed my believe in God. Perhaps changed my "denomination". LOL. I found the below from the internet and I think it explains it very well.

When someone asks “Is Lent biblical?,” the answer depends on what you mean by “biblical.” If you mean “Does the Bible specifically require Christians to practice Lent?,” then the answer is “no.” Of course in that sense of the term, customs such as church choirs or Sunday school would also be “not biblical.” But if you mean “Is the practice of Lent founded on biblical principles,” then the answer is certainly “yes.” The three main practices of Lent from ancient times have been reflection on the significance of Christ’s death along with prayers of repentance and confession, fasting as a means to focus more wholly on God, and giving to assist the poor. All of these are very biblical practices. We are not required to do them specifically during the 40 days prior to Easter, but we can benefit adopting some of the customs of earlier generations of Christians all the way back to the 2nd century.

At this point I should also make it clear that Lenten practices, like any spiritual disciplines, do not make us acceptable to God. We are acceptable to God only through coming to Him by faith on the basis of Christ’s death on the cross for our sins (Eph. 2:8-9). Spiritual disciplines are means through which God works in our lives helping us to grow to spiritual maturity, which is being conformed to the character of Christ (Eph. 4:13; Rom. 8:29). Thus, these practices are for our benefit, and not a way to “earn” anything from God. Sometimes Christians in earlier generations lost sight of this fact.


posted by Janelle at 12:37 AM 0 comments

God is Silent

God has been so silent. Did not even hear Him breathe. But His presence does not depend on my feelings. Certainly not upon my unbelieve. God is not present if I believe that He exist. He is not Absent when I do not believe in Him. He is still there and He is still God.

Someone once said that "we need the conscious presence of other people to become sensitive to God's presence". I saw Him in the faces of people when they worship. I saw a glimpse of him in the testimonies given by others. I saw Him when I was reading. I saw him in creation. In the photos that I took. In nature when I was observing. He is definitely there but He is still silent. I am dying to hear from Him but He is still silent.

Perhaps it is enough to know that He is everywhere that I look. Everywhere that I turn to. He is with me. My silent care giver. My silent comforter. My silent Father. For whatever reason I am not hearing Him, I trust that He is leading me in this journey.

Some of my photos which helps me see the beauty of creation.












posted by Janelle at 12:08 AM 5 comments