My journey...

When we say someone is spiritual, often it means he or she is "walking right". They read their bible daily. They go to church and they are seen to be in many ministries and are active in church. Lately I met a person who says that I am very spiritual cause I talk about God and seem to "have it altogether". I do love the Lord. Don't get me wrong.

Thinking about this, what is spirituality and what is religious? Does it mean that a person who does not read his bible daily is not spiritual? Someone who is going through a hard time is not spiritual cause in God we are suppose to "have it altogether?"

I think that a person struggling with life but have a desire to make sense of it with God is more spiritual than he who seems to "have it together" but in his heart prides in his own righteousness and am putting on a mask to "fake" his experiences. Basking in his own religiosity and not spirituality.

Being spiritual is a matter of the heart condition and we do not always feel righteous but we seek after He who is. We are still in submission to His Lordship whether we know what is happening or not. We still walk in that brokenness knowing that if we try to make it on our own, that will not really satisfy us. So all we can do is wait and hang on to whatever faith we have. Trusting in the only One who have the answers. Sometimes, we feel like the picture. A stone on another stone connecting just by a small surface area trying to balance our faith and will fall anytime. But "Where can we go, you have the words of eternal life". Allow Him to bring the directions and healing. Whether it is from the church or not.

I am a real life person with emotions and a life as well whether I am a Christian or not. Becoming a Christian does not take me away from being human and being subjected to suffering. Probably the difference here is I struggle with God and ultimately, I have this hope and assurance that He will not leave me alone. That He has a plan for my life. At the moment I may not see but as I walk with Him through this, I know I am strengthened day by day and I have a hope.

There is a reason why the bible speaks so much about suffering. As Christians, we do not escape suffering. As we walk closely with Him, we are bound to cause friction with the environment around us.

Each person who struggles with his life with Christ, take hope. Trying to make sense of your life? Hang on there. What you are going through could well be a spiritual thing. You may not be seen as "Spiritual" but as the Spirit guides, He teaches and leads. He often teaches us through our sufferings. Through our loneliness and times of confusion. But He never leave us or forsake us while we are going through it. Let not your heart grow weary. Continue to hold on to the faith. You may not be wanting to read the bible or even pray but that is ok. It is not in your doing but in your being. Your being in Him. Allowing Him to still be Lord. As we seek, we will find. Sometimes, I am just silent thinking of Him. Not necessary I have to do anything. God, I am here. I do not know what to say. Let me know you are here too.... and just rest.

Community of believers who believes in you helps. Who will stand by you and pray with or for you. But not the ones who ask you to "snap out of it".

Please do not be religious and try to fit into a mold that an institute puts on us. Where there are people who seem "Spiritual" and "righteous" but in whose eyes? I am not against the church but I am tired of the church trying to tell us what is right in their own eyes. Looking at a person as a product of their instituition but not as a person who is different from each other. Struggles are seen as things that hinder a person cause they cannot contribute to the better of the organisation if they are given time off to seek God for themselves.

Seek the Lord with all your heart and lean not upon your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight.